Thursday, June 19, 2014

Love The Person, Not The Gender



Pink Dot is a non-profit initiative to promote the acceptance of the LGBT community in Singapore. I strongly believe that it is a great project because what we need in this world is love, acceptance and non-judgement. I am definitely attending this year's Pink Dot. In my excitement, I Googled for more information on Pink Dot and found myself at the comment section of this video. Please do take your time to read the comments if you would like to understand the intensity of disgust I am currently feeling right now.


Bringing up my point on non-judgement, honestly, who are we to judge? All these arguments that different people should not be accepted is saddening. If you're a female opposing this idea, how does it feel like if we're still living in the olden times where females are looked down upon and despised as lower humans? If you're Asian and people criticise you for your skin colour, how would you feel about that? 


Racism, Sexism, Ageism, and other -isms. 


It is the same logic here. Just because people are different doesn't mean that we should judge them. Haven't we heard of the saying "everyone is different and unique in their special way"? If you agree with that, let me bring your attention to some of the absurd comments made on the above video in promotion of the Pink Dot 2014 campaign.




How would you feel if you were gay and reading these comments? It's okay to disagree but it is not okay to be so terribly rude and insensitive about it. Is there really a need to be so unkind?

In Wenwen Lam's argument, if we cannot fit into a society we should just kill ourselves. I'd say that Wenwen Lam is thinking like Hitler. Let's just gas chamber Asians, Blacks, Females, Hispanics, People with Disabilities! Oh and since we are at it, how about including ignorant people? I mean, they don't fit into our society right? Because they're different. Why not just have a bunch of synonymous humans who are Caucasian, blonde and smart? 

What Wenwen Lam is implying in his/her stance is that, if you don't fit the social norms you should kill yourself. If you're fat, kill yourself. If you're skinny, kill yourself. If you're not pretty/handsome, kill yourself. We should not accept people because they are different. That's what you're implying right Wenwen Lam?

I might be rambling, but I am trying to bring across a point. Just because people are different does not mean we should treat them any different.


Most of you reading this are not gay or bisexual or transgender. Neither am I. But what if you were? What if you genuinely loved someone from your same gender with all your heart? What if the tables turned and we were only supposed to like people from the same gender? Are we correct to think that we should love the gender and not the person for who he/she is?

Should we discriminate against the minority because they are the minority?

Touching on the transgender point, many of the transgender individuals feel that they were trapped in the wrong body since a young age. They had picked up so much courage to stand for what they believed in and changed their sex. It is not easy to make a decision to change your gender, especially considering the amount of judgemental people in this world. I would like to take this moment to say that I am so proud of all you warriors. 

"If you judge people, you have no time to love them." Maybe you don't want to love them. But in this day and age where everyone is judging everyone, would you rather be loved and accepted for your differences or ridiculed and mocked for them?

What I am pleading you for once, is to let go of all prejudice and hate. Close your eyes and put yourself in their shoes. Try and understand for once. Does your disgust at the sight of two women holding hands give you the rights to hurt other people with your unkind words?

You might ask, how about the religious aspect of this argument? My response to that is, I believe every religion, how different, revolves around the values of love, kindness, acceptance and non-judgement. Yes, the bible said Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve, but did the bible also state to hate people who are different? Hate the sin, not the sinner. I would like to emphasise that I am not religious, therefore my argument here might not be accurate. But this is what I feel. Will God rather we love or hate

"Whatever your religion is or if you don't have one, God created us or something must have created us. So whoever created us, have made us straight, gay, lesbian etc. So who are we to go against that something or God when we ourselves are not the Creator but the created ones. The purity of the heart comes not from waging hatred but accepting you, me and everyone else as equal beings, nothing more and nothing less. For there is a point of time when each of us shall return to the Creator or that something and its either you return good or you return bad. What makes you feel so damn sure that you are gonna be a part of Heaven when your whole life is dedicated to condemning other beings that you think are doing everything wrong and all that you have done is purely right. Negativity in this life exist because people are still discriminating without realizing that negative and positive attracts which then creates a strong equilibrium that translates into a word called PEACE. If you think you still deserve to be a part of Heaven, how about start that journey by learning to LOVE, and most importantly learn to be HUMAN." (https://www.facebook.com/schazwan.soldato/posts/10152254447873261)


We can make a change together. We're blaming 'society' yet we are society. So to make it a better place, we must first change ourselves first. Start from yourself. When you see a gay couple in public, smile at them. When you see a transgender on the street, smile at them. Wait, fuck that. Smile at everyone you see because we are all the same and smiles are powerful :-) Rid yourselves of all those negative judgemental thoughts and love.

Sometimes we only see how people are different from us, but if you look hard enough, you can see how much we're all alike. We are all humans, we all have a heart, a brain and we are so similar. We desire to love and be loved by the people around us. 


Do people who are different deserve less love than the people who "fit the society"?


I am not expecting people to change their views after reading my post. After all Paul Coelho said "Don't waste your time with explanations: people only hear what they want to hear". But I hope, at the very least, that I have set some of you thinking. We cannot simply accept everything the society throws on us. 

People who are still anti-LGBT, I hope that you can at least be kinder with your words. Everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle, and so are the people of the LGBT community. You might not agree that it's right, and that's fine. I believe humans can coexist with their differences as long as people are accepting and understanding towards each others' differences.


People who are pro-LGBT, thank you for being so understanding. I hope that you will also understand that there will always be people who are against LGBT, and it is okay. Stand strong for what you believe in and hope for a better world. Hope that one day, we can see two men holding hands at a supermarket as something as normal as receiving treatment from a female doctor.


All you lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender fighters, be strong. There will be change, slowly but surely. There are many people who support you lovely humans.


My sister told me, "We won't be able to change people's thinking. We can only be less judgemental ourselves in the hopes of making people around us less 
judgemental also." Against or pro LGBT, I hope that humans can be kinder to one another regardless of their skin colour, gender, age or sexuality.




For more information on Pink Dot 2014, check out their website http://pinkdot.sg! See you there in pink :-)

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